Wednesday, September 9, 2020

Pan-Galactic Gargle Blaster Party 1983 in River Heights

At the end of of June of 1983, the graduating class of Kelvin High School was not done. Many were headed off to university at U of W and U of M in the fall, some further afield. Some were working already. 
However, there were a few concerts to attend, a few house parties to go to, work to earn money before school and 60 days of renting Star Wars to watch.
The concerts attended. Some local acts too. Think I saw Elias, Schritt and Bell several times. 
August 27, 1983 The Police
September 14, 1983 David Bowie
I took a miss on Hall and Oates which had a reputation as one of the worst concerts in years and made fans of the group turn into critics. Smarmy was used to describe Hall at that event.
Like a lot of high school students, Kelvin kids watched the re-packaged BBC series Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy which began in December of 1982 and ran through the winter of 1983. That, and a whole lot of Monty Python, Fawltey Towers and some Doctor Who gave the class a plethora of useful material to disrupt classes. 
Run away! Run Away!
What? Behind the rabbit? It iiiiisss the rabbit!
Every sperm in sacred.
Upon graduation in 1983 from Kelvin High school and the interim to what was to come next, Tom George had the Brock Street home address to himself as the parental units made a pilgrimage to the home land. The result of this was a determination to bbq and to find the formula for the Pan Galactic Gargle Blaster, the drink favoured at Milliways, a bar at the end of the galaxy. 
It was described as thus:
"...having your brains smashed out by a slice of lemon wrapped round a large gold brick."
At the time, there was no way to know what the recipe was. Lots of experimenting ensured.
This is what some say it is:
  • 1 oz vodka (that Ol' Janx Spirit)
  • 1 oz Clamato (oh, those Santraginus fish)
  • 1 oz ice cold gin (Arcturan Mega-gin)
  • 4 oz Zipang Sparkling Sake (Fallian marsh gas)
  • 1 oz Creme de Menthe (Qalactin Hypermint extract)
  • 1 Jalapeno (tooth of an Algolian Suntiger)
  • Sprinkle with lemon zest (Zamphuor)
  • add an olive
We used several of those ingredients minus the sake. Somehow a Tom Collins ended up being made many nights.
Regardless, a formula was devised, tickets were sold to the initial tune of $115. However, more tickets were sold at the door when supplies ran out. In the end the tally was north of $300 for a high school/university party. A punch bowl was filled, the formula made and the dress code of bathrobe and tie loosely enforced on a lovely night in July.
Tickets were printed up on Jeff Thomas' ancient printing machine along with our business cards of Angus Corporation which caused problems at the border a few times.
Angus Corporation hosted the party. Angus was Tom's dog who was more less held together by steroids and alcohol. He was a springer spaniel with perennially blood shot eyes and pissy attitude about how his dinner was prepared.
Road construction was taking place on Brock so it was a mess on the street with hundreds of students coming to Tom's house. Cars were parked down three streets.
All in all a successful event except for one neighbour who called early in the morning and got hold of Tom's brother who took the heat for the late night festivities. Tom was fast asleep. And would remain so till mid-day when we would watch Star Wars rented from Video Zone on Academy for the 17th time of 60 days of rentals.
In less than six weeks, university would start for many. I'd be off to University of Winnipeg, Tom and Jeff off to University of Manitoba and some off to work and places beyond. 
You never really think where everyone might be. For many, it would be the last time we'd all be together for those that made it.
In the end, Milliways will always be there and perhaps will be again. I have my bathrobe ready.

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